The Secret of Dallin

Today, I spent some time pondering my primary calling. Something is different than last year...well, duh: new kids, new teaching companion, new ward members. Of course, something is different. But this is something else. Last year, for the first time in all my years as a Primary teacher, I sometimes felt more like the student than the teacher. I would come away from my class with an answer to a personal struggle or inspiration on something I could do to improve my life. I never missed Sunday School or even Relief Society because I always felt like my cup was being filled. Now don't get me wrong, I love Primary. I love my Primary class. I love that they are reverent and sweet and so excited about baptism. But today I was lamenting the loss of something I have become accustomed to last year.

I spent some time talking it out with Steve today and I discovered the little secret I was missing this year. It's Dallin! At times, he was difficult but that was just the nature of the trial he was given for this life. But he was also full of the spirit. He would just say things that were so very inspiring to me. One day, while doing a maze in Sharing Time he taught me a great little lesson about life. The maze had very tiny print, you were suppose to look at the choices and choose the right and that would lead you to the Celestial Kingdom. But because the print was so tiny, I was trying to read it to the kids. When I got to Dallin to help him, he said he did not need me to read it for him because he was just keeping his eye on the end. Keeping your eye on the end, hmm. In this world where everything is always a little skewed or in tiny print it can be difficult to discover which choice is right, but if we keep our eye on the end, we will always make the right choice. Another Sunday, I was inspire by our High Councilman (Ed Rock) to try to see the spirit in my life more. His talk went along well with the Primary lesson, so I took the opportunity to ask the class what they thought I could do to see the spirit in my life. Dallin raised his hand and told me just to decide that I will. "It's that simple?" I asked him. And he said something like, "Yes. You can choose to feel the spirit or not. You decide." I miss those statements.

To his parents: I know that on one hand, he is a great trial. There are difficult aspects, new trials, and mystery surrounding so much. But on the other hand, he is really close to Heavenly Father. He understands the working of Heavenly Father far more than any other 8 year old I have encountered. He really is a sweet spirit trapped inside a body that can't understand the world the way his soul does. I am sure you already know this.

After a year of sharing the spirit with him every week, my spirit misses it. It took me a while to figure out what was different... what had always been different about last years' class. He was the secret ingredient. His spirit always seemed to assist the others. And all though he may have annoyed his classmates from time to time, I could tell that his spirit really inspired theirs. I have never had a Primary class before or since that is the same. And I miss it.

I hope that this in no way reflects poorly on this years class. They are really wonderful kids and I love them. I love teaching them and watching them learn. I really do enjoy my time with them. This is just a little ramble on what I miss....